Lately I've been finding myself in a reflective mode. It could be because 'things' are changing or maybe it's just a sign of getting old-er. Either way, I've been thinking a lot about the my life and what it will become.

Where I'm at, I really don't know how it will turn out. I'm stepping into a new adventure where I don't know where it will lead, all I know is that it's something that I must take. Most of the time I don't even know what the next step will be until I get there then it just presents itself. Honestly, this is somewhat an unusual place for me, I used to always have a plan, not this time. A scary place to be, yet freeing.

There is so much uncertainty, but I am confident that this is where I need to be.

Remember when you were young and thought about what you'd like to be when you grew up? Now that you've grown up is it what you wanted it to be? Would you rather take hold of your life or give it back to the one who has created it? Could it be that life is just 'like a perfect piece of art displayed for all to see'?

Ten years ago I came across a song that I always go back to when I'm in this mood. This is how it goes...

A shapeless piece of steel, that's all I claim to be
This hammer pounds to give me form, this flame, it melts my dreams
I glow with fire and fury, as I'm twisted like a vine
My final shape, my final form I'm sure I'm bound to find

So dream a little, dream for me in hopes that I'll remain
And cry a little, cry for me so I can bear the flames
And hurt a little, hurt for me my future is untold
But my dreams are not the issue here, for thee, the hammer holds

And the water, it cools me gray, and the hurt's subdued somehow
I have my shape, this sharpened point, what is my purpose now?
And the question still remains, what am I to be?
Perhaps some perfect piece of art displayed for all to see

So dream a little, dream for me in hopes that I'll remain
And cry a little, cry for me so I can bear the flames
And hurt a little, hurt for me my future is untold
But my dreams are not the issue here, for thee, the hammer holds

The hammer pounds again, but flames I do not feel
This force that drives me, helplessly, through flesh, and wood reveals
A burn that burns much deeper, it's more than I can stand
The reason for my life was to take the life of a guiltless man

So dream a little, dream for me in hopes that I'll remain
And cry a little, cry for me so I can bear the pain
And hurt a little, hurt for me, my future is so bold
But my dreams are not the issue here, for thee, the hammer holds

This task before me may seem unclear
But it, my maker holds

The Hammer Holds by Bebo Norman